I spent some time today on my lunch breaking pondering just how popular I really am. I mean, my blog has almost 1100 hits in the past 2 months. I got on yours recently and I didn't see that you posted anything since 2007. Probably because you don't have as many friends as I do. People like reading what I write - my linguistic capabilities are far superior to the useless dribble that stutters forth from your hunting-and-pecking fingers and mushy brain.
Just thought I'd let you know.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
Power Outage
I just got back from my second lunch of the day. It's not quite "Fourthmeal", but fantastic nonetheless. At roughly 11:27 am on Monday, July 13th, half of the lights in the front office lost power. A woman quietly strode into the workspace area, the only sound being the click of her stiletto heels on the thinly carpeted floor with nothing separating it from the concrete subfloor below. Not really, but I thought it would be cool to make it sound like a detective story because Bill grew a mustache, and all he can talk about now is his first wife and Dennis Franz.
Pretty soon after the power went out, I decided to go to lunch because I was unable to actually get any work done at my desk. The midday meal was brief, as it only took a short while to eat my Big Mac and throw a couple of McDonald's Cokes down my gullet. Upon returning to the office, I learned that the other half of the electricity had gone the way of the sabre-toothed tiger and wooly mammoths of days long past and freaking died. All that remained was a warehouse full of medical devices, medical device paraphernalia, and an office filled with post-modern day computing equipment, left exactly as it was when the power went off almost a full 45 minutes earlier.
After a physically, mentally and emotionally draining half hour of sitting in the loading dock with some co-workers, the decision was made to make the trek to the local wing joint for what was most appropriately termed "Second Lunch". This meal is a close cousin of the traditional Hobbit "Second Breakfast", but as you can most likely devise, this meal consists of lunch instead of breakfast.
While I didn't actually eat anything on my "Second Lunch", the time spent NOT at work was a welcome addition to my day. For the time being, I am stuck at my desk with our email servers still down and my desk phone on hold with some unknown number playing all different sorts of Muzak through the external speaker. The voice that periodically interrupts and says "Please hold, we'll be right with you", also has a calming effect. I hope something happens soon, because I'm about to tear my ears out through my throat.
Pretty soon after the power went out, I decided to go to lunch because I was unable to actually get any work done at my desk. The midday meal was brief, as it only took a short while to eat my Big Mac and throw a couple of McDonald's Cokes down my gullet. Upon returning to the office, I learned that the other half of the electricity had gone the way of the sabre-toothed tiger and wooly mammoths of days long past and freaking died. All that remained was a warehouse full of medical devices, medical device paraphernalia, and an office filled with post-modern day computing equipment, left exactly as it was when the power went off almost a full 45 minutes earlier.
After a physically, mentally and emotionally draining half hour of sitting in the loading dock with some co-workers, the decision was made to make the trek to the local wing joint for what was most appropriately termed "Second Lunch". This meal is a close cousin of the traditional Hobbit "Second Breakfast", but as you can most likely devise, this meal consists of lunch instead of breakfast.
While I didn't actually eat anything on my "Second Lunch", the time spent NOT at work was a welcome addition to my day. For the time being, I am stuck at my desk with our email servers still down and my desk phone on hold with some unknown number playing all different sorts of Muzak through the external speaker. The voice that periodically interrupts and says "Please hold, we'll be right with you", also has a calming effect. I hope something happens soon, because I'm about to tear my ears out through my throat.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Phew!
It's like a Breathe Right strip for my wallet. This is only about the 5th time I've taken my car into the shop this year, and I've already spent over $1600 in fixing/maintaining it. The last time I took into the mechanic a couple weeks ago, they said they couldn't fix it and that I needed to take it into Honda because it was something to do with the Emissions Control Board (sounds like a government agency inside my car - they were preventing my charcoal canister from making any headway in the quest to be "green" by saying it didn't meet the required zoning regulations - or something to that effect - I did really well on the analogy part on my SAT's, if you can't tell).
The mechanic who last looked at my car told me that I was looking at roughly another $800 in repairs, mixed in with a bunch of other jibber-jabber, gobbeldy-gook, & flim-flam. Thankfully, I speak all of those languages, so I could filter them out and listen to only what I wanted to hear.
After being freaked out for having to take my car to the dealer, and expecting them to come up with a laundry list of things that are wrong with my car, not to mention it having to take 3 weeks for me to get it back, I was pleasantly suprised to be wrong. I got a phone call today from the mechanic at Honda who told me that the repairs would only (ONLY!) cost me $325 and my car would be nearly perfect thereafter. Given the fact that the dang thing has 190,000 miles on it, I was ecstatic.
Despite the fact that in an hour or so I'll be $325 lighter in the wallet, it sure as hell beats $800+ additional issues. Praise God!
The mechanic who last looked at my car told me that I was looking at roughly another $800 in repairs, mixed in with a bunch of other jibber-jabber, gobbeldy-gook, & flim-flam. Thankfully, I speak all of those languages, so I could filter them out and listen to only what I wanted to hear.
After being freaked out for having to take my car to the dealer, and expecting them to come up with a laundry list of things that are wrong with my car, not to mention it having to take 3 weeks for me to get it back, I was pleasantly suprised to be wrong. I got a phone call today from the mechanic at Honda who told me that the repairs would only (ONLY!) cost me $325 and my car would be nearly perfect thereafter. Given the fact that the dang thing has 190,000 miles on it, I was ecstatic.
Despite the fact that in an hour or so I'll be $325 lighter in the wallet, it sure as hell beats $800+ additional issues. Praise God!
Monday, July 6, 2009
A Roommate Named Bill
A Roommate Named Bill is finally off the ground! I was able to finalize the contract for the domain name last night after nearly a month of price-haggling with it's original owner Dwayne Noisewater, who moved out of his house and now owns the domain name I Live By Myself Now. We were finally able to find some common ground other than the fact that we both have lived with roommates named Bill. He also has a cat named Stefan, but his cat is ugly, so I couldn't relate to that.
Either way, the site is up and running, and ready for you to read. I'm having my web designer mess with the layout a bit, but cash has been a little tight lately since I purchased the domain, so once I am able to build the funds back up to pay my guy, he should have a sweet layout set up for me. If you would like to donate his $20 flat fee to help me finish the design, I won't complain - just paypal me the money and wait for that site to be updated.
Anyway, I should get back to work. Let me know what you think of the new blog - I'll still be updating regularly here, so bookmark both of my sites!
You keep it real Mexico!
Either way, the site is up and running, and ready for you to read. I'm having my web designer mess with the layout a bit, but cash has been a little tight lately since I purchased the domain, so once I am able to build the funds back up to pay my guy, he should have a sweet layout set up for me. If you would like to donate his $20 flat fee to help me finish the design, I won't complain - just paypal me the money and wait for that site to be updated.
Anyway, I should get back to work. Let me know what you think of the new blog - I'll still be updating regularly here, so bookmark both of my sites!
You keep it real Mexico!
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Hallelujah!
Well, I am proud to say that I have made it through yet another Independence Day with all of my appendages still attached.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
The Memo
Apparently I missed the memo. All week, I've been putting the new cover pages on the TPS reports and dealing quite well with the PC load letters and making sure that I cleaned up my own mess in the break room. You might say that this week I've been "above the line" or that I've "refused to lose". It's been a satisfying week, even uplifting with the prospect of a 3 day weekend and a holiday filled with cookouts, cornhole, beer & things blowing up. Not only are those 4 things some of my favorite in the entire world, but being able to experience them in conjunction with one another and simultaneously is downright thrilling.
The reality of the matter, however, is that I did not realize that Thursday was in fact, the New Friday. As a result, today defaulted to the usual "Casual Friday". This morning, I went through my usual routine - Feed Steve in my underwear, make coffee, shower, get dressed, distract Steve from the front door so I can get out and shut him in, drive to work...etc.
It was only after I arrived to work and was gracefully released from the clutches of a 2 hour morning meeting that I realized the gravity of my oversight only hours before. I was the only person in the office decked out in my usual (but extremely classy - Dress For Success!) working attire, while everyone else had taken both the initiative and liberty to wear their most comfortable pairs of jeans and trusty 3 year-old shoes accented by faded t-shirts with stretched collars.
Despite my oversight in the chosen wardrobe for the day, I've realized a few things - 1)people will still talk to me, even though I look better than they do, which must mean I have a fantastic magnetic personality, & 2)The fact that I forgot to wear jeans proves the fact that I am human, despite what most of the populous believes.
Well, I'm off to convince my boss that since I'm such a fantastic dresser, he should let me off early for the holiday. After that, I'll be preparing my gullet for the influx of hot dogs & beer, and my ears for the sound of holes being blown in my parents backyard - illegally, of course. You keep it real America!
The reality of the matter, however, is that I did not realize that Thursday was in fact, the New Friday. As a result, today defaulted to the usual "Casual Friday". This morning, I went through my usual routine - Feed Steve in my underwear, make coffee, shower, get dressed, distract Steve from the front door so I can get out and shut him in, drive to work...etc.
It was only after I arrived to work and was gracefully released from the clutches of a 2 hour morning meeting that I realized the gravity of my oversight only hours before. I was the only person in the office decked out in my usual (but extremely classy - Dress For Success!) working attire, while everyone else had taken both the initiative and liberty to wear their most comfortable pairs of jeans and trusty 3 year-old shoes accented by faded t-shirts with stretched collars.
Despite my oversight in the chosen wardrobe for the day, I've realized a few things - 1)people will still talk to me, even though I look better than they do, which must mean I have a fantastic magnetic personality, & 2)The fact that I forgot to wear jeans proves the fact that I am human, despite what most of the populous believes.
Well, I'm off to convince my boss that since I'm such a fantastic dresser, he should let me off early for the holiday. After that, I'll be preparing my gullet for the influx of hot dogs & beer, and my ears for the sound of holes being blown in my parents backyard - illegally, of course. You keep it real America!
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Canada Day!
Well, here we are. It's been a full year spent waiting for this very day and specifically, this very moment. For those of you that don't know, it happens to be one of the most important days of the year on my calendar - Canada D(Eh?)! (Lame, I know...)
I'm all dressed to the nines in my best Canadian-style clothing (made in Taiwan) and I've made a pledge to eat exclusively authentic Canadian cuisine today. Before I left my house, I poured the 2 full gallons of milk I had in my fridge into a couple Ziploc© bags, so I could truly get into the spirit and the tradition of the great country, whose glorious and nearly magical day we celebrate today.
This day is one for the ages. A day to celebrate the rich, diverse culture of our Northerly neighbors, and their fantastic contributions to our world. While their actual positive contributions may be quite scarce, we should take time to recognize their contributions in general, and deal with them accordingly. One example would be the band Nickelback, another would be William Shatner, Avril Lavigne would be a 3rd. as you can see, not many good things come from Canada, but today is a day to forget all of that. It's Canada's day people! Get on board!
Anyway, I'm off to Tim Horton's for some Timbits and a coffee spiked with some Newfie Screech. You keep it real Canada!
I'm all dressed to the nines in my best Canadian-style clothing (made in Taiwan) and I've made a pledge to eat exclusively authentic Canadian cuisine today. Before I left my house, I poured the 2 full gallons of milk I had in my fridge into a couple Ziploc© bags, so I could truly get into the spirit and the tradition of the great country, whose glorious and nearly magical day we celebrate today.
This day is one for the ages. A day to celebrate the rich, diverse culture of our Northerly neighbors, and their fantastic contributions to our world. While their actual positive contributions may be quite scarce, we should take time to recognize their contributions in general, and deal with them accordingly. One example would be the band Nickelback, another would be William Shatner, Avril Lavigne would be a 3rd. as you can see, not many good things come from Canada, but today is a day to forget all of that. It's Canada's day people! Get on board!
Anyway, I'm off to Tim Horton's for some Timbits and a coffee spiked with some Newfie Screech. You keep it real Canada!
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